I would love to post a picture, but our camera's batteries died and we can't find the battery charger. I just got a haircut the day before yesterday, and...it did not turn out the way I expected. I wanted a chin-length A-line bob because all I was ever doing with my hair was putting it in a ponytail. In my book, that is haircut time. I got a picture off the internet of exactly what I wanted, and I thought my hair would do just that, but as the guy was cutting it, he started making comments about how my hair was actually thicker than average, and oh! when you take some length off your hair has a lot of body (with an ominously implied dot, dot, dot). He blowdried it but didn't put any gunk in it (thank goodness!) and it looked...well, in my husband's words, middle-aged. Yes, my husband actually used the term "middle-aged" to apply to me. Can you tell he wasn't happy with my haircut? He was practically swearing. Over my hair. A guy. It was that bad.
I'm not sure what to do about it. I've already paid for a haircut, and money is scarce enough that it took me well over a year to bring myself to pay for this one since my last one, so I'm certainly not going to pay for another one in less than a week. Anyway, it was middle-aged when it was all demurely blown dry, but you should have seen it the next morning. My hair is pretty wild when it is short. It's been a while so I guess I had forgotten. It stuck out from my ears in a perfect equilateral triangle. That's pretty much what it looks like now. Major eighties hair. And I just got glasses again too, to save my contact lenses, so that only adds to the effect. I look like an eighties chick called Doris. It was really my fault for thinking that it would fall into a sleek little bob. When it is short I really need layers so that it can just do its wild thing and look like I planned it that way. It was kind of fun in California's humidity because it was actually curly, really curly like Shirley Temple. Here in New Mexico where the average relative humidity is in the single digits it is just, well, crazy. Not really frizzy, but certainly not straight. Just big. I have big hair. Ugh.
Ode to They Might Be Giants:
Triangle Head, Triangle Head
Triangle Head hates Sleek A-line Head!
They have a fight, Triangle wins
Triangle Head
I wish Joslin used-to-be Smith were around. She would know what to do. Help! Any suggestions, anyone?
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5 comments:
Lol. I'm sorry. Your post struck me as very humorous. You could adopt wearing hats constantly. Good luck!
I think I will start wearing hats! I have always thought it was a shame that hats aren't popular like they were in the 1930s because I have always looked good in hats, but I feel too dorky wearing them. Maybe I can start a trend!
Sorry about the haircut. I like my hair the way it is, but fear of the unknown also keeps me from changing it. Hats would work:) Of course my solution would be to get another cut . . .
HAHA! That was hilarious to read! You're a great writer but I'm sure its not that bad! Triangles have their place in this world you know-square pizza never tastes the same. I'm sure your triangle head will find its place.
Ha, ha, Shawntae. Thanks for the vote of confidence! I suppose it will grow out. I only just noticed yesterday that one side is significantly longer than the other. So that is why when I put it in a ponytail one side will stay in and the other is too short, so it falls out. Nice, huh? I'm telling you, this was an awesome haircut.
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